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Saturday 21 April 2012

Biwi Se Syanpanti Nahi Karni Chahiye

"Bahut Se Log Apni Biwiyo Se Syanpanti Karte Hai Aur Sochte Hai Ki Budhu Banaye, Par Is Biwi Ne To Haal Behaal Kar Diye"
Ek Aadmi Fauj Mein Tha Aur Har Mahine Biwi Ko Paise Bheja Karta Tha
Ek Bar Us Ne Apni Biwi Ko Khat Likha: “Is Mahine Salary Ke Badle 100 Kiss Bhej Raha Hoon
Biwi Bhi Puri Tez Thi Palat Ke Jawab Bheja: “Aap Ki Salary Ke Badle 100 Kiss Milay, Hisab Bhej Rahi Hoon:
Doodh Wala 2 Kiss Mein Hi Maan Gaya,
Teacher Ko 7 Deni Padi,
Sabzi Wala 7 Main Nahi Mana To 9 Dene Padi,
Kiryanewala 9 Kiss Se Nahi Mana To Usko 5 Aur Di,
Makaan Malik To Roz 6-7 Le Hi Jata Hai,
Aap Chinta Mat Karna, Mere Pass Approx 35 Aur Hai, Yeh Mahina Aaram Se Kat Jayega.”

Yaar Ese Na Kar Chusne De

Ladki: “Jaanu Mere Muh Mein Daalo, Main Choosungi
Ladka: “Nahi Nahi, Tum Kha Gayi To Main Kya Karunga?
Ladki: “Yaar Itne Kanjus Na Bano, Tum Doosri Cornetto Le Lena

Who Was In Charge?

Once Time All The Organs Of The Body Were Having A Meeting, Trying To Decide Who Was In Charge.
The Brain Said: “I Should Be In Charge, Because I Run All The Body’s Systems, So Without Me Nothing Would Happen
The Heart Said: “I Should Be In Charge, Because I Pump The Blood And Circulate Oxygen All Over The Body, So Without Me You’d All Waste Away.
The Stomach Said: “I Should Be In Charge, Because I Process Food And Give All Of You Energy.
The Rectum Said: “I Should Be In Charge, Because I’m Responsible For Waste Removal.
All The Other Body Parts Laughed At The Rectum And Insulted Him, So In A Huff, He Shut Down Tight.
Within A Few Days, The Brain Had A Terrible Headache, The Stomach Was Bloated, And The Blood Was Toxic.
Eventually The Other Organs Gave In. They All Agreed That The Rectum Should Be The Boss.
The Moral Of The Story? The Asshole Is Always In Charge.

Din Raat Dikhe Bas Mujhe Ek Hi Cheez

Pappu Ne Santa Se Puchha: “Papa, Mummy Ke Do Aur Cow Ke Chaar Kyu Hote Hai?
Santa: “Madarchod, Kaha Se Sikh Ke Aaya Hai Ye Sab Tu
Pappu: “Papa, Main To Taangon (Legs) Ki Baat Kar Raha Hoon, Apko To Din Raat Bas Chuchi Hi Dikhti Hai